Saturday, January 16, 2010

5 Farji Ways Of Loosing Weight!!!!!!!!!!

Weight loss , losing weight , obesity , obese are buzz word in world where 1 out of 7 people dont get meal twice a day!!!!!. Well we are not health expert but we did figure out there majority giving advise on internet also are not health experts!!!!!!!!. So here are our top five suggestions for loosing weight.

1) Switch On News Channel as soon as you wake up :

It is now common knowledge that brain in near to alpha level when one wakes up or is about to sleep for around 10 minutes. That means subconsious can be directly reached during this time. So as soon as you wake up , switch on the news channel specially hindi news channel with hum aapko batayenge , punch lines.

They would tell you how you may die in accident or would be blown up with bomb. If you survive this two , you are likely to be fired in recession waali economy . If you survive job , 100 k.g. daal will rob you off and if you still survive , hakeemullah from all the way to pakistan would reach your door step overcoming Pakistan army and Indian army!!!!!!..

By listening to all these your brain would be full of doubt , anxiety and you are likely to loose your apetite. Preflably you need to continue this exercie for 3 months , twice a day. Once when you wake up and once before you go to sleep. Dont skip this routine!!!

2) Get In Touch Of Religious Fanatic :

Here which religion doesnot matter. Just make sure you get in touch with any of fanatic without violent streek. Meet him at least once in ten days. He would convince you that your life is useless , you are selfish and working against god's master plan. Meet him till your heart fills with guilt. This would also make you loose you apetite and in long run your weight too.

3) Take Loan And Invest In Shares Without Research :

Now this is really simple. Take loan from friends , family , bank , boss , neighbour and invest in shares like majority does. That is without understanding how it works. You have 90% chances of loosing your money . This would bring tension in your life and make you loose weight!!!!!!!!

4) Give your better half insecurity :

If unmarried , your girl friend is enough to give you insecurity but if you have loving , caring girl friend , look for some one who is gift crazy. This is time tested way of staying normal weight. If married try to give your wife , little bit of insecurity. Try to control her or something. Rest she would handle , making sure your brain is so much occupied that you loose your weight.

5) Involve In Office Politics :

This is really simple. Poke nose in others matter , involve in gossips. Needless to say where this will lead you to.

This are really simple steps with would give you tension , might increase your blood pressure and you may loose your mind too. But loosing weight would be easy!!!!!!!!!

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